


According To Plan

by PhantomGrimalkin



Category: Incredible Hulk (2008), Iron Man (Movies), The Avengers (2012)
Genre: First Time, M/M, Post-Movie(s)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-05-23
Updated: 2012-05-23
Packaged: 2017-11-05 20:42:02
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,810
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/410815
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PhantomGrimalkin/pseuds/PhantomGrimalkin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In which things don't go quite according to Tony Stark's plans, but maybe that's not such a bad thing.</p>
            </blockquote>





	According To Plan

This had not been part of the plan.

 

Things didn't always go according to plan, but generally when they didn't, it ended very poorly for Tony Stark. Which is probably why he'd make very vague plans- like just saying 'attack' or just hoping Bruce would get his soon-to-be-green ass over there rather than working out some complex strategy that would be thrown out the window within 5 minutes of fighting anyways. It meant he could say most things went according to plan, because he hated having to adjust when things didn't.

 

On the other end of things, Bruce Banner had given up on planning things the second that little girl disappeared out the window. And he had gotten used to plans falling apart not long after the Hulk had made his debut. Sure, he had the ever-present back up of “If anything goes too bad, Hulk can break through about anything and get us far, far away in a very short amount of time”, but he didn't even bother thinking any farther than an hour ahead at the time. He just tried to pay attention to what was going on and go with the flow

 

It happened during one of the first meetings they had as a team, Fury had demanded they be there at an ungodly early hour (according to Tony, which 10 am apparently qualified as). Tony walked in and saw Bruce drinking chamomile tea and made a remark about how he couldn't believe anyone could function without coffee in the morning. So Bruce admitted that he couldn't drink coffee because it sped up his heart rate. Everyone else in the room looked at him as if Bruce had just walked into a Sunday service and announced his atheism. It was so outlandishly over the top, considering that Bruce had nearly starved to death during a few of the times he'd been homeless and coffee was a huge luxury to him, that he made a wry remark about how he was glad he didn't tell them that he couldn't have sex.

 

At that point, the team didn't know Bruce well enough, were still thinking that the wrong comment would bring them face to face with the other guy, so no one said anything. Steve turned bright red, Natasha raised an eyebrow, Clint and Tony just stared at him as if expecting him to say he was kidding, Thor smirked. Fury cut in before anyone could say anything by reminding them that they weren't here to discuss Banner's private life.

 

It did, however, cause Tony to switch tactics from testing how much control Bruce had over himself to trying to work out ways to get Bruce laid. He didn't mention this at first, he just collected data and did some research. He asked Bruce to wear a monitor or 5 into battle so he could work out just what triggered the transformation. He looked into different methods of sex and their effects on the body- not just pulse, either, also what chemicals were released and in what quantity.

 

Which led him, eventually, to the conclusion that Bruce was completely wrong in the conclusion that he couldn't have sex. 

 

Telling him this was part of the plan. Working out how to remedy the egregious problem that a member of Tony's team didn't feel able to have sex whenever he wanted (Tony did take a moment to wonder if Bruce wanted it, but assumed that Bruce wouldn't have said he  _can't_ have sex if he had no interest). Or at least the egregious problem that  _Bruce_ didn't feel able to, he wasn't really interested in helping Cap get over his 1940s prudishness, but he felt better framing it as if it weren't about Bruce specifically.

 

What was not part of the plan was fixing this error by basically throwing himself at Bruce.

 

He really had meant to set Bruce up with someone else. He was aware Bruce had a serious girlfriend at one point, and while teasing straight men could be fun, it didn't lead to sex as often as Tony might like (more often than you'd think, though). He figured that Bruce would prefer someone as calm and relaxed as he had to be all the time. He actually had a list of names that might be good for Bruce, although it was tentative until he found out what Bruce's type actually was or what kinks he might have.

 

When he actually broached the subject, well, then things stopped going according to plan. He thought he'd had a good plan, too, he started the conversation in his best lab at his tower, during a lull while Bruce was just waiting on a machine to come up with results and seemed fairly relaxed and easy going. He brought up the subject and Bruce rolled his eyes but muttered something about how he figured this was going to come up again, which seemed like a very good sign. Because who wouldn't want Tony Stark to set them up for a night of mindblowing sex? Especially someone who'd had to go years without it, and not by choice. (there were some people, Tony knew, but he was still assuming that Bruce wasn't one of them)

 

Then it became abundantly clear that Bruce was actually aware that he technically  _could_ have sex, he just didn't think anyone would want him, not with who he was. And Tony's attempts to correct him veered from how attractive people in general must find him to how attractive Tony in particular found him. 

 

Which Bruce didn't believe, which annoyed Tony because he wouldn't joke about this and Bruce really shouldn't have self esteem this low, which meant Tony worked harder than he should have to prove it, and eventually ended up kissing Bruce and didn't get pushed away like he expected.

 

That hadn't been part of Bruce's plan, either. Part of his back-up escape plan was making sure he didn't get too close to anyone, so that he wouldn't have to leave anyone behind again. Tony had been making that difficult from day one, and he had to admit that Tony Stark was an incredible kisser. And feeling wanted was a bit too nice to pass up. And every bit of his brain that usually screamed that he had to stay away from everyone, that he wasn't worth human contact or kindness, was swiftly drowned out by every part him that thought it had been too long and how much he missed this and finally letting himself admit that, yes, he had been eyeing Tony's ass whenever he got the chance and it was nice to know those feelings really were returned.

 

So Bruce ignored the thought that this was a bad idea, and pulled Tony closer. And Tony ignored the thought that this wasn't supposed to happen, and started kissing Bruce as passionately as he really wanted to. And somewhere along the way Bruce wondered why Tony had personal lubricant in the lab just long enough to decide he didn't want to know, but their brains quickly stopped bothering with such higher levels of thinking in favor of enjoying the sensations.

 

A few hours later, Tony decided that he'd done enough for now to make up for those years Bruce had gone without. Well, to be more precise, Bruce ruefully whined that if they tried one more time it'd kill him and Tony nipped at his lip but he just grumbled and so they ended up lying together on the floor in a position that should not have felt comfortable.

 

All reservations and shame were pretty much gone at that point and that's when Bruce, head on Tony's shoulder, started gently tracing his finger around the arc reactor with a look of admiration that only someone who understood it could have, murmuring vague affections that sometimes included levels of physics that most people couldn't understand at their most lucid. Tony generally wasn't the cuddling type, he generally didn't end up in bed with anyone he'd want to cuddle with after. If actually having sex with Bruce had been part of the plan, he wouldn't have expected to end up like this. If anything, he'd have figured on working out some sort of fuck buddy arrangement if it was any good, then they both get back to work. Then Bruce had slung an arm over him and hugged him close and he didn't want to cause problems by shoving him off, and he was now incredibly happy that he didn't.

 

Sure, every science magazine in the world had raved about how amazing the arc reactor was, and every University wanted him to come give lectures on it, and a few geniuses had managed to get him to show it to them up close, but having someone touching it, and him, with that affection while appreciating not only the science behind it but what it meant to Tony was special. Always one to go by instinct, he gently reached down and placed a kiss on the top of Bruce's head, smiling slightly at the way the dissheveled curls tickled his facial hair.

 

This hadn't been part of the plan, somehow it was much better.

 

Eventually Tony's stomach started rumbling and he whined about being hungry and Bruce laughed a much too giddy laugh, still thoroughly high on endorphins and all those other lovely things he'd almost forgotten about. They both managed to get up, Bruce starting to get dressed while Tony tutted that this was his house and no one would see them besides JARVIS, who already had, and possibly Pepper, who'd seen worse, so don't bother getting  _dressed_ . Bruce still insisted upon pulling on his boxers and half-buttoning his shirt, and asked what he wanted for dinner. 

 

They ordered in, like Tony always did, becauseTony didn't have the patience to cook and Bruce's time in third world countries left him with cooking skills that were so far below Tony's standards he wouldn't even acknowledge the result as food. (Bruce actually wasn't a half-bad cook, but everything was  _healthy_ and Tony objected to it on principle) It was late, that had been part of the plan as well. In case Bruce got uncomfortable or angry at his suggestion, Tony wanted to be sure he felt like he could storm off without leaving a full day's work behind. And now it was much, much later and they watched some hoaky sci-fi movie and spent the entire time complaining about how unrealistic it was. Bruce was the first one to fall asleep on the couch, his head resting on Tony's shoulder. Tony didn't want to risk waking him up and having Bruce reject the offer to go to Tony's room, so he shifted carefully and let an arm rest gently on Bruce, half-watching the movie until he fell asleep as well. 

**Author's Note:**

> I didn't initially plan this to be no dialogue, then I couldn't work out a way to put it in and I thought it worked nicely like this. I might make it a series, I'm not sure yet.


End file.
